I
walk in the unknown landscape of my mind.
I
read the Latin term, "Terra Ignota", and thought it would be a
fitting title for my new blog. It means just that, "Unknown Land",
and it describes where my head is at these days. Since coming back to Baghdad I
have been trying my best to cover new territory in my quest for knowledge and
truth. And I feel the strong tides of change pulling at me now, drawing me
closer to that healing place I've wandered towards and away from my entire
life. I have recently shared a large piece of myself with the people I care for
and in doing so have given myself a strong, helping hand. It's one that I've
reached out for many times in the past 7 or 8 years but could never seem to
grasp. Helping oneself, as opposed to
receiving help from another, is liberating. It's made me really start to look
for answers closer to home.
So
as I begin to journal this new and unknown terrain I will say right off that
even though it seems I know the general direction...the journey and final
destination make me nervous, if not downright frightened. Living with fear is
something I'm used to. Years past have seen that fear eat at my soul and chip
away at the blocks that hold me up. But today there is a certain calm
accompanying the demon who walks beside me. I try to find courage in that. I reach
out to a God I know exists and ask him to help me find the answers and live
with the fears. It's in His shadow that I write from today.
-Jim
Franks
